Real Life 102: Being a Grown-Up is Confusing

It has officially been a little over two years since I graduated college, and life since then has been...eye-opening. It always amazes me how in every phase of your life, you have all sorts of older people telling you what things will "really" be like with your next step. Sometimes they're right, sometimes they're a little off, but more often than not you say, "Psht, silly Old Person, that's nonsense"  - only to eventually realize that they were in fact at least partially correct. You then quietly walk into the corner, put on your Dunce cap, and figure out what to do next.

These past couple years, I feel like I've been the dunce more than ever before - and I know that I'm definitely not the only one (far from it, in fact). Before post-grad life, everything is spelled out for you - you finish middle school, you go to high school. You're done with Brownies? On to juniors. Our successes and failures are defined by good grades and bad grades, awards (or lack thereof), and acceptance letters to schools and programs. In some form or another, everything seems, to some extent, to be laid out in black and white. Post grad life? Not so much.*

I, along with many of my friends and fellow 20-somethings, have hit a point where, for the first time in our lives, we're sitting here wondering about what comes next. We are officially the nobodies of the work force, trying to figure out how to work our way up and learn about some sort of positive contribution that we can, well...contribute (other than successfully loading the printer with paper, which can actually be a feat in itself sometimes). We wonder why our hard work doesn't produce instant results like it used to, and wonder what in the world we're doing with our lives. Where will I end up? What do I want to do in life? How do I have fun and maintain a job and bills? Why is it so much harder to make new friends?? TOO MANY HARD QUESTIONS I DON'T WANNA GROW UP!

When I studied abroad in Spain my junior year of college (and subsequently found myself ready to take on the world - oh the naivete), my friends and I went to go see Avenue Q on our trip to London. If you've already seen it, well then you're a step ahead of the game, will know what I'm talking about, and I officially give you 10 points to Gryffindor (or brownie points for life - whichever you prefer). If you haven't seen it, then 1. You totally should, it's an awesomely hilarious musical and 2. Don't worry, I'll give you a summary and will save your brownie points for when you do see it. Avenue Q is basically the grown-up version of Sesame Street, and centers around a character named Princeton and his hysterical journey to try and discover his purpose in life after college. Toward the beginning of the play, there's a song called "What do you do with a B.A. in English?" As an English major myself, when I first saw this play I thought, "That's not me! Being an English major isn't useless!" After college? Oh, how sadly true I found that song to be (at least the first part, I don't actually think that my life sucks). I suddenly found myself thinking, "Oh crap, that's totally my life right now..."

The thing is, there's tons of college prep courses and schools to get ready for university life. Sure, those courses can only do so much and college is still an adjustment, but at least there's something. There's nothing in college that seems to even attempt to prepare you for real life. Everything seems to be going pretty smoothly, then all of a sudden you leave school and wonder what in the world you got yourself into with this whole adulthood thing. This article on Buzzfeed that I found yesterday seems to sum it up pretty well: What You Think Life After College Is Like vs. Reality.



Plus, not only are you surprised by how difficult things are in your early 20s, but you wonder how long it's all going to last. When will things finally come together? Will I ever find the right career? What about my future husband? When in the world is he going to show up? How many things do I have to screw up before something finally goes right?

Luckily, Buzzfeed (in its infinite wisdom) posted another very good article that gives all of us 20-somethings a little sign of hope. It's called 19 Successful People Who Had A Rough Time In Their Twenties.

Wait...we don't have to have it all figured out right now? There's a chance for success later in life?? Who knew...

Now, I'm not saying that we should completely give up on our twenties. Not at all. We still need to do our best to figure it out and live life to the fullest. And who knows, maybe things will come together faster than we think. All I'm saying is that, if this confusing-beyond-belief period seems to drag on a little bit longer than we might like, that doesn't mean that things won't get better down the line. We "millennials" are used to instant gratification, and I think it's about time we learn a little patience and perseverance. We still have a lot to learn in life, and from what I've heard, our 20s are one of our biggest times for growth and learning. Whether it's with our relationships, our careers, our overall life plans...everything will come together in good time.

So to my fellow lost-and-confused 20-somethings out there -- chin up! All will be well, and we'll each figure everything out (or at least accept the fact that we may never figure it out) in our own time and way.

*As an added disclaimer, I obviously know that life has not been completely black and white and that everyone has their own experiences that can be exceptions. I'm just speaking in general terms on a high level, and based on how many of my peers also seem to find themselves feeling lost

The Art of Being Silly

Last week I met up with a friend for a long-overdue coffee date. We sat there for two hours talking about all sorts of different things going on in our lives: family, boys (or lack thereof), faith, you name it. There was one topic one might not necessarily expect, though - we both agreed that lately, we haven't had enough silliness in our lives.

You all know what I mean. There's having a good time and enjoying what you're doing, and then there's being plain old silly: acting like a bit of an idiot, throwing all your cares out the window, and laughing hysterically at nothing at all. Basically, being a big kid. Like those times in college when we went on a secret mission to deliver burnt cupcakes, played practical jokes on each other, and had a feather fight with a busted pillow. What happened to things like that? Why had life gotten so...serious?

Image from hdwallpapers.in

Long story short, we both felt like we needed more silliness in our lives. It's a sad realization when you feel like you've fallen into the humdrum of a daily adult life and haven't been goofy enough, then have no idea how you're going to get back into you silly ways. Luckily, I had the help of a few old friends to jumpstart me back into the game.

This past weekend I headed up to Ohio with a bunch of my friends from high school for our friend Josh's wedding. Not only was it good to be with everyone again, but my high school friends have a way of making me laugh like no one else can. They're the ones that are just flat out goofy and get me to laugh hysterically for no particular reason at all. It's pretty awesome. Combine that overall atmosphere with a few more funny people (my friends' significant others), a road trip, and 8 people crammed into one hotel room, and you have a recipe for gloriously wonderful mayhem.

So tell me...when was the last time you asked yourself (and announced to the car), "Why is that truck's butt so weird? We should pull up and ask the driver why his butt looks weird." Or the last time you argued about whether or not mandating a Despicable Me minion for every person is a form of slavery? And have you ever been proposed to with a RING POP? At a WEDDING?! Because I HAVE. That's right. Be jealous.

We all need fun and silly moments like that. And not just once in a blue moon, we need them on a regular basis. Sometimes, though, there are so many things demanding our attention that we can forget about living out our inner child. No matter what it is, it seems like everything in life requires some sort of responsibility and dedication. Some of those things are annoying adult worries that we're officially stuck with forever (like work, bills, taxes, relationship problems, bugs in your kitchen); others are more enjoyable and have a goal of improving your life (like eating healthier, working out, spending time on your hobbies [and discovering what those hobbies are], meeting new people, growing in your faith). All of these are things we need to focus on and are good to give time to in our lives, but every once in a while we need to remember to kick back and throw all cares out the window.

It's funny, though, as I've been writing this post I've been thinking, "Okay, now how can I get more silly into my life?" - basically trying to plan it out and subsequently completely defeating the point. A lot of times being silly is part of being spontaneous, and we just have to embrace it! I think that being silly isn't so much about planning (unless you're plotting an epic practical joke) but more so about being open to it at any given moment. You never know, you could walk around the corner and find yourself in the middle of a spontaneous dance party. So kick back, relax, don't take things so seriously, and remember how much fun it is to sing along with "The Mysterious Ticking Noise":

Cooking Change-Up

The longer I've been living in my own apartment, the more I've been making my food from scratch. I used to buy all sorts of prepared food...frozen dinners, boxed pasta dishes, etc. But a combination of limited freezer space and realizing that it's actually cheaper to make things from scratch helped me to modify my grocery shopping habits. The thing is, I've still been making the fastest and easiest things I have in my pantry, so my meals have gotten pretty...boring. I've been wanting to try new recipes, but they always have random ingredients that I'm never able to use in another dish. Eventually those randoms end up sitting in your fridge, wasting away, and before you know it you're throwing out all those extra dollars you spent. When you're working on a tight budget like me, hearing those wasted tasty morsels hit the bottom of the trash can sounds more like your wallet screaming in agony. Ouch.

The thing is, when you spend your time NOT trying new recipes and sticking to the basic ingredients that you know are quick and easy, you find yourself eating multiple varieties of dull chicken far too often. Ladies and gentlemen, welcome to my life. I've gotten to the point where it's about time to mix things up literally and figuratively. So I pulled out the cookbooks, opened up Pinterest, and started the search for some new recipes. This time around, though, nothing was going to waste!

I started looking for recipes where I knew I would be able to find other ways to use the ingredients after I used them in the main dish. Even if I didn't usually use the ingredients, I was determined that I would keep an open mind and find a way to work them into multiple dishes so they wouldn't go to waste (including with my crazy schedule, when I normally need to make things quickly or in advance). I was also going to do all this while being healthier at the same time. Hours later, I was still trying to find recipes I was willing to risk budget-wise. I felt like I had wasted my Saturday afternoon, felt like I wasn't healthy at all, and it all just made me completely overwhelmed. GAH. 

Luckily, I eventually realized that I was taking on too much at once, remembered I don't have to change everything up all at the same time, and decided to take baby steps. I finally settled on one recipe, found a few new (but not totally foreign) items that were on sale, made my grocery list, and walked away.

Today, I put it all into action.

I started with the grocery store. I admittedly spent a little bit more than I have been lately (and more than I would have liked), but I think I'll be able to put everything I got to good use (and hopefully not let any of it go to waste!). Then I decided to make the one recipe that I had picked out, a new, hopefully-actually-healthy recipe. Other than my quick and dull dinners (which I don't consider to be "real" cooking), I haven't done a lot of cooking lately, so it was really great to dive into an actual cooking project again. I dove into the kitchen, reconnected with my inner chef, and whipped up some......

Carrot and Quinoa Muffins. 

Carrot and Quinoa?? Who would have thought I would make something like that? Until recently, I never thought I would have. But I did! With everyone talking about quinoa these days, and all sorts of people close to me like roommates and family members cooking it up like wildfire, I decided to jump on the bandwagon and give it a try (plus quinoa stores well and is incredibly versatile, so I know it won't go to waste). These muffins were simple enough to make so that I would totally make them on a regular basis, but also required enough work to make me feel like I was actually cooking. Plus, they turned out to be ABSOLUTELY AMAZING.

I have to admit that I was hesitant when I decided to try this recipe; I thought that the muffins would turn out dry or grainy. But they're not at all! They're soft, moist, and delicious. They basically taste like carrot cake, and if I hadn't told you, you would never know there was quinoa in them. New breakfast/morning snack? I think so :)

I'm still working on taking the time to take good photos, but for now you get to enjoy a lovely pic of one of these tasty morsels chillin' on my awesome, fake, covered-to-look-like-granite counter:

If you'd like to try out these muffins for yourself, check out the recipe at the website Good Dinner Mom. You can also find it on my "Culinary Creations" Pinterest board.